So...I just got in my first real car accident, and let me tell you it was not awesome. It turns out I don't plan to text while driving anymore because I was looking down at my phone and when I looked up there was a stopped car in front of me. I slammed on my breaks but obviously not soon enough. Luckily the lady I hit was really nice about everything...she could probably tell I was freaking out a little bit. The entire time we were waiting around for the cops to come I just felt like crying. Then when I had to make a few calls to let people know and that made it even worse. For some reason when I have to say something like that out loud it makes me want to cry even more, but I was surprised I was able to hold it in. So the car that I hit just had its bumper hanging down a bit...but my car was a bit worse. The hood of the car was smushed back, antifreeze dumped everywhere, obviously my lights were crushed. So basically my car got towed, I got a $100, 4 point ticket and a court date.
I'm not extremely bothered by the fact that I don't have a car now. It kinda feels nice...I'm used to driving a lot! To Denver and Loveland many times a week, but for the first time this semester I'm just hanging out in my dorm. I had been thinking I should meet some people around here so maybe this is a good time to do that.
The part that does suck quite a lot is the money part. Prior to the accident, I have about $70 including everything I have in the bank...I'm broke. So this accident is the begining of a massive debt to my parents...ticket, insurance payments, car repair(if it's even fixable)...not to mention I'm still in the process of paying for Blue Knights.
I just want to end everything...not like kill myself or something, but I just want to not be in BK, not have to teach, not go to school, I'm just feeling overwhelmed right now. This kinda feels like a good time to start over...except for the fact that I'm in the middle of a bunch of things going on right now. But I think I could still look at this positively and just kinda change whats been going on, cuz I haven't necessarily liked how this semester has been going so far.
So hopefully this can all work out for the best...Wish me luck!