#54

So does anyone walking on the side of the road count as a hitch hiker? ....Actually I don't even care, I say 54 is done! As I was driving through Denver at 1 am my gas light came on. I drove for a ways because I wasn't sure where any gas stations were near by. I finally decided to take the Colorado Blvd exit and as I get in the exit lane I pass a car with its hazards on followed by two people walking along I25. I don't know why I finally convinced myself to stop for them but I did! They ran out of gas and just wanted a lift to the gas station, which convieniently was where I was headed. It was a 17 year old girl and a guy who looked slightly older. She told me they had just left from trying to bail her sister out of jail (which worried me...). She also said they were driving her mom to work and now she would be late due to the gas issue. So it definatley sounds like they needed a hand. We got to the station and I obviously couldn't leave them there to spend 30 minutes walking back to the car so I gave them my gas jug and waited for them to fill up. Drove them back to their car and headed on my way back to the Springs. Crazy night!

101. Crowd surf
102. Make a video blog

Life List

Lately this has been a place for all of my frustrations. That is going to change right now.

My blog is now a place for my accomplishments. And it will be based on my list. :) I've recently started a project to write down each task on my list and hang it in my room. I'm not done yet but I'm excited for it! And then when I complete each task I'm going to take a picture and hang it in place of the card. The only problem is I'm not sure what to do about the already completed tasks....we'll see.
So to start it off here is the list again.

I can't figure out how to paste it so I guess I'll go with a link :)

http://sheasif.blogspot.com/2009/04/100-things-to-do.html

Hmph

So life lately has been awesome. No particular reason, it just seems that everything is good and I've been happy.
Right now....I feel invisible. I don't know why it always seems to come back to this. I don't know why I need so much attention to feel like I matter. There are definately times where I am 100% ok by myself....but why is that different right now?
I need plans. I need adventure. I need projects and work and activities. Otherwise I feel like this.



Stupid computer.




I guess I should go find them. :)

64. Learn to Hula -Done :)

Where to begin?

Why why WHY am I in this place again?! I can only be content with my decisions for a very short amount of time, and as soon as they start unfolding I rethink the entire situation. And it feels like every given week at least one part of my life is at the point where I change my mind. I can't be too upset about this because I feel like lately I have been changing my mind to make the right choices. I am super happy with where I am headed (the parts that I've decided on at least). I got way too much partying out of my system so I can relax that I won't be making those bad decisions again. I'm also SO glad that I am doing blue knights again. I really do enjoy being around everyone there and I just love playing music. Along with that I'm excited (and proud) that I have been practing more than I ever have before and it is no longer a huge chore. However, this rekindled love of music is causing my dilema. Yet again, I am really drawn towards being a music major. I am currently enrolled to attend CSU in the spring as a Natural Resource Tourism major. Recently I have been hoping that I could double major with that and music....but honestly, that does not sound like the best thing to begin half way through my sophomore year. I spoke my my advisor today and he let me know that my hopeful plan would be a very daunting and time consuming task. I do like college but I would like to graduate eventually lol. So, why don't you just change majors, you may ask. Well, being a music major requires an audition and it's already November. I don't think I can audition and be accepted as a music major for the spring semester. (Although I really do need to stop assuming and talk to Hollenbeck about it.)-WHOA....maybe I should just go to metro/UCD....new plan to think about.... Anyways- I am done with my core credits so I can't just attend CSU this spring and start music in the Fall, I need classes to take in January. And I can't just not go to school because I currently have a house that I need to pay rent for until May and the only way thats happening is if I'm in school, and I'm not even living here after December. ugh. I can't even type all the contributing factors, it's so ridiculous.
Ok well I guess I have a new option now. I can move in with Allison and go to Metro or UCD for music.
Benefits-close to BK, music major, many of my friends are in the area
Negatives- I wanted to help out with LHS indoor...kinda far, I'll have 2 rents to pay(my dad will pay one though...just kinda dumb still), it's not CSU
I feel like this option may lead to me transfering again....to CSU at some point. but maybe not. I really just need time to not be in school (CRAP! I just realized Metro/UCD would also require applying to the school duh!). So now I really just need to take a semester off since I'm so far from making any decisions, but if I'm not in school I will have to pay rent so I would have to stay in Colorado Springs since I can't pay 2 rents on my own but I dont want to stay down here cuz it's so far from BK! I'm so stuck......I don't even know where to begin....

What to do...

So I just found out that there is a new outdoor recreation center opening at CSU next semester and they are currently accepting applications. This could have worked out PERFECTLY! I was considering doing the outdoor adventure guide thing at Pikes Peak which would've made me extremely qualified to work there. And all of that would also correlate with my upcoming major-Natural Resource Tourism- which I think would also correlate with the fact that I want to do Americorps. Oh and I would have completed a few more things from my list (i.e. kayaking or rock climbing). So basically, it all could've worked out quite well....but instead I'm taking dumb required classes and working at Edible Arrangements.
I just want things to start working out finally. I wish I wasn't so indecisive but I feel like I am because I want everything to be great, and if one thing isn't great then I go looking for something better. For example...I currently love my job and love living with my sisters and I love a lot of other stuff about the Springs. BUT the school situation isn't too great so now I'm packing up and moving back north.
And I wanna be around people who wanna do stuff I wanna do. Sure my sisters and I are a lot alike...but I want to get more into all the stuff I mentioned before with the eco outdoor kinda stuff. They're not really into that. lol. And yet again I don't know if I should be doing indoor because it will take up so much time but it has nothing to do with what I'm planning on doing with my life.
Hmph...I'm happy now, I just feel like I'm not getting anywhere and I'm not sure how to make it better...I keep waiting for the next thing to happen in my life but it never turns out like I expect.